Out with my man, looking like a girl.

Today is my birthday and I was getting ready for my date with Matt this afternoon.  I changed my clothes and ran downstairs to grab something.  Titus, sitting on the couch, said in a loud, drawn-out voice, "Oh--you  got  new  clothes?"

If only you could have heard the wonder in his voice.  That my 3 year old would notice such a difference in my clothing.  His voice and his staring urged me to ask, "What?  Do you think I look pretty?"

A short silence and then, in his drawn-out way, "You  look  like  a  girl."

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you know you're a mom:  when your toddler notices when you quote-unquote "look like a girl".  And I was just wearing jeans and a pretty shirt.

Offended.

Oh, how easy is it to be offended?  And if we're honest, if we slow the wounded bus down a bit and really think about it, how often did the other person probably mean something innocent?  Or at the very least, did not mean to offend you?

I know it's especially hard online.  You can't see faces, hear inflections, etc.  I've had tiny things online bother me and  it  is  so  silly.  I've been praying that God help me to not be offended so easily.  Hopefully with time, I can manage my emotions better.  Because it is one thing when your mind understands that the person did not really mean to offend you.  But going farther, I want my heart to actually accept it and forget.

What an easy sin.  I think I can call it a sin?  Definitely a product of our fallen nature.  In a perfect world, we would all say the perfect things and we would all be pure.  But we don't live in a perfect world... and I think the desire for this sort of perfection in interaction leads to the desire for political correctness.  But once again, we're fallen.  Not everyone's PC is the same PC.

And the mass email/quip/forward/joke/message that someone sent out--they didn't think twice about it.  They read it at face value, it didn't throw off any alarms when filtered through their own personal experiences, and they sent it on.  So when it reaches you, and you're hit with the emotion of whatever personal experience it dredges up for you, try to remember that it was not sent out of maliciousness.  It was not intended to hurt you.  Try to be objective.  Take those extra moments to hold the wounded bus back a stop.  Address it if you need to--and address it with LOVE.

And the comments you receive on some post that you don't fully understand or sound hurtful or rub you the wrong way or simply don't agree with you?  Stop.  Think.  Ask.  And make sure that you act in LOVE.

This whole offended thing is simply too easy.  And can I dare say that it's easy because it's selfish?  And what do each of us know better and come to the defense of more than our own selves?  I wish I wasn't so selfish.  I wish I didn't care about me nearly as much as I do.  I wish I was concerned with myself a fraction of what I am.

So my goal for the immediate future is to take on offendedness.  (Yeah, I used my understanding of English to make that a word.)  Offendedness, I am going to fight you.

Ordering Online

Received an email from Sears about a big online clearance sale.
Ordered some clothes.
Received the items I ordered and one item that I did not order instead of one that I did.
(I received a gray sporty tank top instead of a black beaded tank top.)
I contacted customer service via online chat.
He told me to go to a store and exchange it for the top I wanted.
I asked if he could check if any of the stores close to me carried that top.
He looked and none of them did.
(Maybe should have looked before blindly telling me to drive to my local Sears.)
So he told me I could order it online again instead and drive to Sears to return the mix-up top.
So I ordered the black beaded cami again.
The same gray "shelf bra" (as it is labeled) arrived a second time.
I called customer service.
She was very nice; we chatted a bit.
Ultimately she told me that I could keep the top.  (Well, both tops.)
Wait... you mean keep the two shirts I paid for because I paid for them even though I didn't want them?
Yep.
Or... I can drive on down to Sears and return them.
And she left me with this ominous warning about items that say "while quantities last" and implied that I should know better than to necessarily expect to receive the right item if it says that.
But as far as online shopping (or any shopping goes), that's sort of how I roll.
And I've never before run into this fine (imaginary) print that reads:

While Quantities Last:
We may or may not have this product (regardless if it's only listed in one size or color making you think our website updates product availability).  We may substitute this item with another item and hope that you don't notice.  Or secretly we want you to like your replacement item even more than the item you actually wanted, because then we feel extraordinary deep down inside (and get rid of more of our extra merchandise).  But if all else fails, our mistake will get you to drive down to our store--we know that ordering online in no way displays a lack of desire to drive down to our store--and we all know what happens when you drive down to our store... sometimes you buy more.